Are You Not Achieving Your Goal Because Your Standards Are Too Low?
Has anyone ever told you to ‘raise your standards?”. Sounds rude doesn’t it. Let’s explore this for a second. We all know that if you have high standards then the likelihood of achieving bigger goals is greater. Raising your standards will not only allow you to hit goals but it will give you lasting results. Let’s look at it another way...I would say we seem to get our ‘musts’ but not our ‘shoulds’. We all have a should list, right? I should lose weight. I should return that call. I should clean the house. I should go for a run. I should start eating healthy today. We all have them.
Should lists are like a New Year's Resolution. It is a list of things we would like to achieve but we are not really committing to them. They are just a wish list. It is a list that would be great if you ticked them off but you kind of already know that it won’t happen. So, you really are not committed to making them happen on a subconscious level. The belief is not there.
Why is it that when the goal moves from the ‘should’ list to the ‘must’ list we get it done? When you decide that you absolutely MUST achieve something we as humans somehow believe we can and consequently just go for it. All of a sudden there is urgency and purpose. You absolutely MUST achieve that goal otherwise you have failed and because of your standards that is not good enough. You find a way no matter what. You have essentially just raised your standard.
Take a moment to reflect. Has there ever been a moment in your life when this has happened. You may have been a smoker and you had been trying to give up for years then something happened that made you say, NO MORE. I MUST give up. This is the moment when your priorities changed, your standards changed and now you must complete the task. It is a powerful shift. Somewhere in the mind when we make this shift, when we make it a must, we attach ourselves to it and it no longer requires will power. It becomes a part of who we are. When we do that there is no turning back. In my experience, over 25 years working with personal training clients, those who decided that they MUST achieve their goal always did. They also did it quickly and easily. People who identify with themselves, know who they are and want to be successful.
I can tell when a client won’t reach a goal just through their choice of language. “I will try and lose this weight but I have always been this way and my family is big boned too.” Their standards have not changed. That goal is still on the should list.
My challenge to you if you are struggling with a fitness goal is this...
I want you to think about why your goal is sitting on the list it is. What if it became a must. What if you raised your standards. Is it possible that your goal is on your ‘should’ list because for some reason when you were growing up someone told you that you couldn’t do something. Somehow that has stayed with you and this has become the glass ceiling? Glass ceilings are made to be broken you just need to want to break it.
It won’t be easy. Nothing ever is that is worth achieving. Ask anyone who is successful at something. You will find the common thread being that they work hard, consistently and don’t stop until they have reached the goal. Ask anyone who looks great how many times a week they train. They will most likely tell you it is 4, 5 even 6 times a week. Do you think they have more time than anyone else? No. They just have prioritised the workout as they have raised their standards enough that it just becomes part of who they are and their weekly routine. There is no easy way!!
My question is...Who set your standards? You or someone else and why can’t they be raised?
Written by Kirsty Robbie - Founder of StudioForty6 and CHEK exercise coach.